Rules for Life

In his book: Dumbing Down our Kids: Why America's Kids Feel Good About Themselves, but Can't Read, Write, or Add, Charles Sykes gives a list of "rules" kids should know before they graduate from high school. Many of them are amusing and a bit tongue in cheek, however, they shine a light on a reality that is permeating our educational system (and through that our society). This reality argues that how we "feel" is more important than what is right and wrong.

I freely acknowledge that a person's feelings are important, and it is imperative that teachers endeavor to not adversely affect the self-esteem of their students. It has become apparent, however, that in some instances this fear of tearing down kids has prevented us from building up productive citizens.

I fear that the generations currently in school are in danger of being ill-equipped to face the challenges of real life outside of our "caring and encouraging" schools. By not setting standards and holding to them, schools have lowered the achievement expectations of today's children. This is a scary reality. This country was built on the hard work and perseverance of generations that understood that any good thing requires effort and, yes, excellence. This "soft bigotry of low expectations" has infected our schools and threatens to cause irreparable damage to our society.

So how does one balance encouragement with the demands for excellence? Fortunately for us, we have a guide book which contains assistance for this dilemma. The Bible. In 2 Timothy 2:15 (Amplified Version) Paul is instructing Timothy on the importance of studying and excellence before God. He says:

15Study and be eager and do your utmost to present yourself to God approved (tested by trial), a workman who has no cause to be ashamed, correctly analyzing and accurately dividing [rightly handling and skillfully teaching] the Word of Truth.

The only way that Timothy would be able to study and become the "workman who has no cause to be ashamed" is if the teacher, Paul, lays out the correct lessons for him to learn and implement. Perhaps this is why, in James 3:1, there is a severe warning for teachers, (also in the Amplified):

1NOT MANY [of you] should become teachers ([a]self-constituted censors and reprovers of others), my brethren, for you know that we [teachers] will be judged by a higher standard and with greater severity [than other people; thus we assume the greater accountability and the more condemnation].

As to the issue of encouragement, I believe the model to follow is Jesus. In all things he told the truth, even when painful or not popular, but always in love. Romans 8:39

39neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord

Educators and students have a responsibility, but the threat of judgment lays on the shoulders of teachers. We must do all we can to inspire excellence through love, encouragement, and yes, even correction. If we do not, we have no one on which to blame the state of world but ourselves.


Charles J Sykes Rules for Life

RULE 1 - Life is not fair, get used to it.

RULE 2 - The world won't care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.

RULE 3 - You will NOT make $40,000 a year right out of high school. You won't be a vice president with a car phone until you earn both.

RULE 4 - If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a boss. He doesn't have tenure.

RULE 5 - Flipping burgers is not beneath your dignity. Your grandparents had a different word for burger-flipping; they called it opportunity.

RULE 6 - If you mess up, it's not your parents' fault, so don't whine about your mistakes, learn from them.

RULE 7 - Before you were born, your parents weren't as boring as they are now. They got that way from paying your bills, cleaning your clothes and listening to you talk about how cool you are. So before you save the rain forest from the parasites of your parents' generation, try "delousing" the closet in your own room.

RULE 8 - Your school may have done away with winners and losers, but life has not. In some schools, they have abolished failing grades; they'll give you as many times as you want to get the right answer. This doesn't bear the slightest resemblance to ANYTHING in real life.

RULE 9 - Life is not divided into semesters. You don't get summers off and very few employers are interested in helping you find yourself. Do that on your own time.

RULE 10 - Television is NOT real life. In real life people actually have to leave the coffee shop and go to jobs.

RULE 11 - Be nice to nerds. Chances are you'll end up working for one.